One of the key life skill areas of the Win Win Parenting program is "Personal Power". The aim is to empower parents with the knowledge and skills to help their children develop their personal power, become resilient and fly through life. Personal power is not about physical strength, it’s about your child’s inner strength, their psychological strength. Personal power is not about overpowering others, it’s about helping a child feel good inside and secure about who they are so they don’t feel the need to overpower or be like anyone else. In this sense, every parent wants their child to feel good about themselves, value their own uniqueness and have personal power, right? So what exactly is Personal Power? What does it mean to have Personal Power? Today's blog is all about understanding three fundamental aspects of Personal Power: self esteem, self confidence and self efficacy and how this can help you to raise psychologically and physically healthy children. You may have heard of self esteem and self confidence as these are terms that are commonly used. You may not have heard of self efficacy, but it is an important part of personal power, so read on to find out how it supports your child’s life success. A lot of parents get very confused about what the terms: Self Esteem, Self Confidence, and Self Efficacy actually mean. Here are some explanations: Self Confidence Self Confidence is all about 'Doing'. People can be extremely confident and have no doubts whenever they complete tasks or they can have very low self confidence and feel unsure of their ability to complete a tasks or activity. And of course anywhere in between from overconfident to under confident! Many parents say, "I really want my child to be self confident." And in the past, I probably would have too. However, after many years of reading and researching about this topic, now I don’t want my child to be highly self confident as a general rule, but what I want is for him to be able to realistically assess his level of confidence right across the spectrum from a very low level of confidence to a very high level depending upon what activity he's doing. Before I confuse you, let me elaborate. If your child is ‘over confident’ about everything, then he could get into a lot of trouble because he may take unnecessary risks even when he’s unfamiliar with the process or task being performed. For example: a child who gets a new bike and has never ridden a bike and is generally over confident may take more risks than they should. "Wow! Thanks for my new bike! It’s wonderful! I’m going for a ride!” Even though this child has not ridden a bike before, if they are overconfident in their abilities they might go to the top of a hill and start riding. As an adult you can see that this could end in disaster. At best, a few scrapes and cuts at worse a more serious injury with a car! Nobody wants to think about that. On the other hand, a child who generally exhibits low Self Confidence is often reluctant to try anything new and that inhibits learning. Ideally, you want your children to have realistic and varying levels of Self Confidence, depending on what they are doing. We want our children to be confident enough to be unafraid of making the first move and trying new things safely, but at the same time, not to be so overly confident that they won't seek help if they don't know how to do something. Helping your children to understand these ideas, will help them learn to assess their abilities and skills more realistically and evaluate the risks they can safely take for a given situation. Ideally you want your children to achieve a balance between trying new things and learning, but doing it safely! It is important to say that in general, men and women have quite different approaches here. Have you noticed in general (obviously this is not true in every instance) that fathers are more likely to encourage their children to take greater risks and mothers are more likely to encourage their children to play it safe. So it’s very helpful just be aware of that when you disagree! The important thing to remember is that raising a child who has personal power and is resilient needs a balance between the two. OK, now you know that self confidence is all about ‘doing’. So what is self esteem? Self Esteem Self Esteem is a completely different matter. Self esteem is not about ‘doing’ it is about ‘being’. To help you understand more about what Self Esteem is, have a go at this exercise. Do you remember the very first day you held your baby in your arms? You looked at your baby and it was an awe-inspiring moment. Your baby was beyond beautiful – the most perfect being. Now stop and think back to that moment - what was your child doing? I'll tell you; probably doing absolutely nothing ‘special’ just looking up at you, waving their arms around and if you’re lucky, maybe a smile and the moment was amazing. Your saw your child as a special person most importantly, they were special without doing anything – they were just being themselves and by just being, your child is already amazing! Each person is a miracle of creation and life, which is the being part of every one of us. Self Esteem is a judgement about ourselves and is about the 'Being' part of ourselves (not the doing part). The fact that we are alive, we can move your fingers, see, walk, and talk is incredible in and of itself. Because every human being from the time they are born and throughout their life is unique and valuable being in the world of creation, means that each and every person has the right to have good Self Esteem simply because they exist. Every person is a miracle! Take a moment right now to just appreciate your life. Think about it - there's blood pumping around your body. You're growing hair and replacing millions of cells throughout your body all the time. How amazing! You have unlimited potential of how your are going to choose to be in the world, which gives you the birth right of good self esteem. Your child doesn't have to do or be anything or look a particular way in order to have good self esteem. Self Esteem is about feeling good about who you are. Self-esteem is a judgment about yourself. So it is so important to help your child see that they have the right to have a good judgment about themselves and sail through life with good self esteem. Self Efficacy Self Efficacy is a term that is not used as much in everyday language so you might not have come across it before. Self-efficacy, alongside self esteem and self confidence is an important part of personal power. Self Efficacy is a combination of Self Esteem and Self Confidence. For example, when I first became a mother, I didn't know much about Parenting but I knew a lot about studying and researching, so the part of me that is my Self Efficacy said, "I don't know about much about raising a child. I have very low confidence with parenting, but I know that I can learn all about child development and parenting with some help and by doing some research." And that's what Self Efficacy is; the belief in yourself, your ability to do something or be something you aren’t yet but aspire to be, and your willingness to do what it takes to accomplish your goals. If you believe you can do it, and you take the steps needed, you have the personal power to achieve your dreams. You can help your child to understand how to develop belief in themselves and empower them to achieve their goals. So now that you know the difference between Self Esteem, Self Confidence, and Self Efficacy, you can help your child to unconditionally love and accept themselves for the amazing being that they are (self esteem); help them develop the skills to accurately assess their confidence with a tasks (self confidence) and finally help them to develop self efficacy to believe in their ability to be the best they can be and do what they love by believing in themselves and having the courage to learn and to grow and to keep going until they achieve their dreams!

Article writen by Laura Donovan - Romper Extract: Dr. Rosina McAlpine, a parenting expert based in Australia, tells Romper via email that stigmatizing this form of parenting with labels, or any other form for that matter, isn't helpful to parents or children, and that it's wise to remember that many of these parents are simply trying to do right by their kids. "We need to understand that parents are thrown in at the deep end when it comes to parenting — no manual comes with the child — and there is so much pressure on parents to be 'good parents' even though they may have had no training in child development or parenting and not have the skills they need to raise happy, healthy, well-adjusted children," McAlpine says. Read full article

Article by Cosima Marriner for Sydney Morning Herald Extract Rosina McAlpine wrote Inspired Children: How the Leading Minds of Today Raise Their Kids, because she believes child-rearing is a skill that must be learned. ''We've got this perception that we're supposed to inherently know how to be a good mother, but it's time we 'fessed up - we've got no freakin' clue,'' Dr McAlpine says. She defines a good mum as one who teaches her child to manage their emotions, develop healthy eating and exercise habits, build resilience, and believe in themselves. ''The best thing you can do right now is go on a parenting course rather than worry about what clothes your child is wearing,'' Dr McAlpine says. ''You're developing a child's brain, emotions, physicality. How about getting a bit of help?'' Link to full article

As a parent, when your kids throw a tantrum, it can make you feel all kind of things, depending on the day. But it's all completely normal, in fact it would probably be weird if your kids were perfect angels all of the time. There are some reasons behind the dramatic outbursts though. Dr Rosina McAlpine, from Australia, is a childcare expert at Win Win Parenting, and knows a thing or two about why children misbehave. Read full Article

Article written by Andreas Pyros Parenting, as every sleep-deprived one of us can attest, is hard work. Wonderful, rewarding, meaningful and difficult. “Each stage has it’s challenge, from managing a toddler’s tantrums to keeping teens safe from the harms of drugs, alcohol and fast cats.” says Rosina McAlpine Ph.D. founder of Australia’s Win Win Parenting education program in Sydney. Unfortunately, kids dont come with an owner’s manual (if only), and none of us going to be perfect. But we can learn to avoid some common missteps that parents tend to make by practicing some smart, simple strategies. Read full article here

We all know that maintaining employee’s physical and mental wellbeing are keys to creating happy and productive workplaces. Many organisations today offer general wellbeing programs for their employees – however, these programs don’t help working parents who have the added stress of raising children. The global pandemic has highlighted the need for workplaces to support their working parents who continually struggle to manage the many responsibilities of work, to overcome the day-to-day demands of parenting as well as navigate the never-ending stresses that life can bring. This podcast explores the important topic of how to avoid parental fatigue and parental burnout. Dr Rosina McAlpine, CEO and creator of the Win Win Parenting workplace parenting education programs interviews Professor Moira Mikolajczak – a leading researcher in this area. Without support, employees can suffer “fatigue and parental burnout” which harms employee wellbeing, harms parent child-relationships and reduces workplace effectiveness. In this podcast Dr Rosina asks all the right questions to explore the topic of parental fatigue with Professor Moira Mikolajczak who is one of, if not the leading researcher on this topic - working as a Professor of Health and Medical Psychology at the Psychological Sciences Research Institute, UC Louvain the biggest French-speaking university in Belgium. Professor Mikolajczak’s current research focus is on parental burnout and she has published extensively in this area. What is discussed in the podcast? In this valuable podcast you’ll learn more about the: Main factors that lead to parental burnout Factors that are protective for avoiding burnout as well as the Road to recovery - back to personal and family wellbeing if a parent is suffering from parental burnout. It was Dr Rosina’s great pleasure to interview Professor Mikolajczak. The podcast is filled with practical ideas about how to avoid parenting fatigue and burn out.

Are you experiencing workplace bullying? Has one or more of your children been bullied at school? Are you a teacher who would like to support children to be resilient and rally against bullying? If you’d like practical tips to support you to navigate your own situation or to support a child overcome bullying, then this podcast is for you. Parenting expert, Dr Rosina McAlpine and Jessica Hickman discuss the many ways you can overcome workplace, online or school yard bullying. In this podcast you’ll learn: What bullying is and what it isn’t Signs your child is being bullied What you can do to support yourself or someone who is being bullied to be resilient and overcome bullying. This podcast is real and raw. Dr Rosina tears up as Jessica shares her personal story of being bullied over many years and is inspired by her courage and passion to help others. Jessica Hickman is the founder of Bullyology and author of ‘The Bullyologist: Breaking the Silence on Bullying’. After suffering extensive workplace bullying herself, Jessica Hickman turned a negative situation into a positive learning and now dedicates her work to preventing bullying in workplaces, online and schools. You can find out more at https://bullyology.com/ Supporting working parents Are you a manager interested in supporting working parents to better manage work and family? Learn more about the Win Win Parenting workplace parenting education programs that empower employees with families to succeed at home and at work. See our range of lone line and face-to-face flexibly delivered programs at www.WinWinParenting.com

I’m excited to share our second interview in our 4 part series on FOOD and your family: how to develop a stress-free, healthy and balanced lifestyle for everyone from toddler to teen. Last week Deb and I explored the topic of Healthy eating for parents: being a good role model for your family. If you could do with a few tips on how to make small, realistic changes so you can have a healthier lifestyle for you and your family then listen to our interview. Teens and body image With all of the issues around body image and peer pressure to eat certain things, to look a certain way – it’s hard for teens to know what a healthy diet looks like and of course we want to help them develop great habits to hold them in good stead for life! Many parents worry about how they’re going to save their teen/pre-teen from a lifelong struggle with being obsessed with their weight and instead learn to focus on health. As a parent you can make a huge different by creating good foundations for life-long health Tips to support teen’s ‘healthy’ attitude to food In this interview you’ll learn how to help your teen by: Balancing their independence with your support when it comes to meals for your teen Shaping your teen’s positive attitude to food Modifying foods that teens LOVE to eat – to give them a healthy base with a taste they’ll love Providing your teen with the right ‘fuel’ at the right time And tips for getting teens to the dinner table Deb has a passion for helping families to develop a healthy relationship with food rather than the impossible tasks of trying to be “perfect” at eating all the “right” foods. We all know that’s hard work, no fun and so of course it’s impossible to maintain. Enjoy the interview! Dr Rosina interviews Deb Blakely, founder of “kids dig food” on the topic of Shaping your teens good eating habits and healthy attitude to food. Deb is a Dietician and Nutritionist, who works with families so they can lose the guilt, stop the battles and eat happily! If you’d like to know more about her workshops, webinars, or have a consultation in person or online email deb@kidsdigfood.com.au or see her website at www.kidsdigfood.com.au

As a parent, you want to live a long and happy life so you can watch your kids grow to become healthy and happy adults and have their own families. All parents want to be good role models for their children BUT many parents have grown up NOT having a healthy relationship with food themselves. Does any of this this sound familiar to you? “I can’t have chips, chocolate biscuits, ice-cream in the house, because I’ll eat the lot”, OR “I know that sugar, carbs, deep fried foods are Bad and only fresh organic veges are good BUT I always go for the bad stuff…especially when I’m upset”. OR Are you on the never ending cycle of diet, lose weight look and feel good… increase weight then diet again? Or Do you start all kinds of different diets looking for the magic one and give up after a few days and feel like a failure? We know DIETS don’t work long-term – what you’re looking for is a sensible, achievable and easy healthy lifestyle for the whole family. If you’ve tried every diet known to man and you’d like to learn more about a stress-free way to have a healthy lifestyle for you and your family, then listen in to this interview. I really like Deb’s balanced approach “that all foods have a place.” Dr Rosina interviews Deb Blakely, founder of “kids dig food” on the topic of Healthy eating for parents: being a good role model for your family. Deb is a Dietician and Nutritionist, who works with families so they can lose the guilt, stop the battles and eat happily! If you’d like to know more about her workshops, webinars, or have a consultation in person or online email deb@kidsdigfood.com.au or see her website at www.kidsdigfood.com.au YOUR FAMILY’S HEALTH AND WELLBEING STARTS WITH YOU. Parents are the role models and the visionaries for their family and so your family’s health starts with you. First, if you are healthy and happy then you have the positivity and the energy you need to manage busy family life. Second, as you move forward on your health journey, you become a good role model for your children. LEARN SIMPLE STEPS FOR HEALTHIER DAY-TO-DAY LIVING Small changes can make a world of difference in your home. By changing your negative beliefs about food and making incremental changes to your daily health habits you’re on the way to a healthier family life. In this interview we’ll explore how to: Take care of yourself and why it’s so important to your family’s wellbeing. Start your healthier eating journey from a place of kindness and curiosity rather than stress and disappointment. Discover how your food rules from childhood can help or harm your attitude to food today. Uncover your relationship with food. Plan how you would like things to be. Move forward in small steps and over time create the healthy family life you LOVE!

Extract from Article From Nine To Noon School refusal is a different kettle of fish than a child simply wanting to stay home for a day. It's a situation where they become so anxious or fearful - and it can be for a variety of reasons - that they refuse to go, repeatedly. While it's difficult to measure how many kids experience this, Dr Rosina McAlpine, founder of th e Win Win Parenting program in Australia, says it could be up to five percent. Dr Rosina founded the parenting wellness workshop, which has been run across Australia and New Zealand, when through her work she realised many working parents were lacking support on how to balance their home life. Dr Rosina has completed a Masters of Higher Education and an education-focused PhD and joins Kathryn Ryan from Sydney to discuss school refusal. Listen to the Interview on Radio New Zealand

Published on Fox News. Article by Nicole Darrah View original article A 2-year-old child was found dead inside a parked car in Kansas on Sunday — marking the ninth such death in the country in the three-week span since a New York dad made national headlines for accidentally leaving his twins in a hot car for hours. The toddler who died Sunday was discovered just before 6 p.m. in Lawrence, a city roughly 40 miles southwest of Kansas City, Mo. Investigators said they received a call about someone who'd been "left unattended," and medical responders determined the child was dead at the scene. FLORIDA MOM ACCIDENTALLY LOCKS BABY IN VEHICLE, OFFICER SMASHES WINDOW TO SAVE BABY FROM HOT CAR At least 33 children have died so far this year from heatstroke while in parked cars, according to Kids and Cars, a nonprofit organization that tracks such deaths. The deaths of Luna and Phoenix Rodriguez on July 26 are among the most high-profile of those cases and helped merge discussions about the annual epidemic from separate, localized tragedies into a connected, national issue. Juan Rodriguez, 39, said he "blanked out" when he left Luna and Phoenix in his car as he worked an eight-hour shift. "My babies are dead! I killed my babies!" he reportedly said after realizing he left his twins in the car, where officials said their internal body temperatures registered 108 degrees Fahrenheit. Described as an "amazing" father of five, Rodriguez told police he thought he dropped off the children at daycare before he went to work. Already this year, nearly three dozen juveniles — children as young as 4 months and as old as 13 years, living in states from California to New York — have died, often due to parents who say they simply forgot their child was in the vehicle. How can this happen? Such deaths are incomprehensible to many who read about them and are particularly puzzling to most parents, who can't begin to fathom how anyone can forget where their kid is — nevermind when that kid is just inches away in the backseat of a vehicle. Dr. Rosina McAlpine, a parenting expert and CEO of Win Win Parenting, told Fox News that parents or caregivers are often in such a rush to get to work, or an appointment, or any one of countless other obligations, they "forget they haven't dropped the child off at daycare or school and rush off to the meeting or work distracted, leaving their child behind." ARIZONA BABY REPORTEDLY RESCUED FROM HOT CAR AS MOM SHOPPED AT TARGET "Later they remember in shock but often it is too late," she said, noting some parents alternate dropping their child off at daycare, and might "forget it was their turn." Similarly, McAlpine notes that people other than a parent, like a caregiver, a teacher, a grandparent or other relative, "may not be used to having a child in the car on a regular basis." As noted by the parenting expert, 429 children who died from heatstroke in cars from 1998 to 2018, or 53.8 percent, were forgotten by their caregivers, according to an analysis from NoHeatStroke.org. Another 209 children gained access to the car on their own. The deaths of Luna and Phoenix Rodriguez on July 26 are among the most high-profile of those cases and helped merge discussions about the annual epidemic from separate, localized tragedies into a connected, national issue. Juan Rodriguez, 39, said he "blanked out" when he left Luna and Phoenix in his car as he worked an eight-hour shift. "My babies are dead! I killed my babies!" he reportedly said after realizing he left his twins in the car, where officials said their internal body temperatures registered 108 degrees Fahrenheit. Described as an "amazing" father of five, Rodriguez told police he thought he dropped off the children at daycare before he went to work. Already this year, nearly three dozen juveniles — children as young as 4 months and as old as 13 years, living in states from California to New York — have died, often due to parents who say they simply forgot their child was in the vehicle. What are other ways I can protect my child? Experts often suggest placing items — especially ones people know they won't forget — like a cell phone, or a purse or wallet, in the back seat of a vehicle to remind you of a child's presence, or even putting one of the child's toys on the front seat to remind the driver of who's in the back. It's also recommended that parents place their children in the middle of the back seat, rather than near the doors. Since drivers are constantly looking at their rearview mirror while they drive, if they can see the child in that line of sight, there's less of a chance caregivers will forget them.

Raise appreciative kids and decrease the clutter in your home by donating – Win Win Too many birthday gifts? Do you feel like your children get too many birthday and Christmas presents? And are you worried about your kids becoming ungrateful? Here are some great ideas to help you raise appreciative children, help those less fortunate and decrease the clutter in your home! Win Win Win! Did you know that charitable acts have physical and emotional benefits? When your child is very young and doesn’t really understand about birthday gifts, why not invite your friends and family to make a charitable donations in lieu of presents for your child. You’re not alone – this is a growing trend – perhaps you’ve already been asked to do this? I first experienced this on our son Cameron’s first birthday, when my colleague Ursula who lives in the UK, gifted a school desk to a child in Ethiopia on behalf of Cameron in lieu of a birthday gift. – I loved the idea and it started me on this journey of gift giving for birthdays too. More recently, my friend Natasha, asked us to make a donation for her daughter’s birthday rather than a gift, so we contributed towards a water well being built in a village and sent her the details. I’m not suggesting no gifts and that every gift should be a donation. While giving to charity for a child’s birthday offers so many benefits, it’s important to maintain a good balance – a gift for charity and a gift for the child – this way the child feels special on their birthday too. Raising well-rounded and caring kids Gifting to charities has grown in popularity as many parents can see the negative impact on their children of receiving too many gifts including becoming expectant and unappreciative. Let’s face it, when children receive gift after gift after gift – it takes away the “excitement” and the “specialness” of receiving a gift. We don’t want to rob our children of this! Parents are aware of the importance of raising well-rounded children who are socially aware and have empathy and care for others. As parents, we need to lead the way role modelling caring and kindness by involving our children in family gift giving and helping others. If learning about altruism doesn’t come from home, where will it come from? It’s not just about having the conversations but actually experiencing it with our children. Here are some of our personal examples. At Christmas time Cameron, Colin and I buy gifts together to wrap and donate to less fortunate children. This gives us an opportunity to talk to Cameron about how fortunate we are and how good it feels to help others. We also buy the Big Issue on a regular basis – In the early days, Cameron asked us why we do that – so we talked about supporting homeless people. This way our son is experiencing the benefits of helping others – how good it feels - with the aim of it becoming an integral part of who he is as a person in adulthood – a caring, empathetic and generous person. Decreasing clutter in your home Then there’s the ‘practical’ aspect of suggesting your friends and family donate rather than bring a gift – it helps reduce the clutter in your home. We all know that when children have too many toys – it’s a mess AND they don’t get to enjoy their gifts properly – there are too many to attract their attention for long. Benefits of altruism for the whole family If we look at the research on altruism – volunteering, donating and caring for others, we see that study after study shows that people who are empathetic and care for others are happier and have greater well-being. This is particularly true for older people. With children – the greatest benefits occur when children willingly give as if they are forced the, benefits are lessened. This is why to get the maximum benefits, if they are old enough to understand its crucial to get your children involved in the giving of “their” birthday or Christmas presents. When children participate in the process they gain the full benefits on the other hand, if gifting is done for them without a choice, they may feel resentful. By being part of the whole process, children feel like they are making the difference in the life of another – they are foregoing a present willingly. Invite your children to can pick the charity they would like to support. This way they will get the greatest benefits of being caring and generous people. Read the full Article